Friends

Oh, Chick-fil-A, why, why, why?  I asked this to no one in particular yesterday morning as my heart raced after seeing a friend's Facebook post and reading his comments about Chick-fil-A and its CEO's recent quote in support for traditional marriage.  I was angry and fired up.  To me, my friend's communication sounded like this:  I am right, and you are wrong. I refuse to acknowledge your side and certain people in this world because of their views.  End of discussion.  In this thread I am expanding on my thoughts for your benefit, but I am not open to hearing your side.

This morning I am calm after yoga class with the parting thought to go forth with peace and love; therefore, contributing to the world.  As I type, my Chick- fil-A age group award winner plaque from the Tobacco Trail 10 Miler mocks me.  A small, stuffed cow sits atop the plaque imploring me to "Eat mor chikin."

My FB friends on both sides of the political spectrum are posting love and hate about the restaurant. What is really sad is that people on both sides of the argument already knew Chick-fil-A makes a tasty sandwich and was founded by a man who held traditional religious and family values.  None of this should be news.  I was tempted to dive into the fray on FB, but I am generally a people pleaser and often decide to keep things to myself instead of publicly patting myself on the back for my own thoughts and beliefs or making others feel bad about their own.

Yesterday around mile four of a sweltering Y run, I found myself surrounded by runner friends helping me talk through the debate I was having with myself over whether or not to keep this FB friend.  After a few miles, I am generally relaxed, and my normal filters fall away so that I am unguarded, honest, and almost uncensored.  At that point I was running with a teacher on summer break, my cupcake-loving friend, and a running series age-division winner who joins us just to slow his pace for an easy run.  Runners are some of the best people around because I find them to be smart, health conscious, driven to improve themselves, and a host of other great qualities.  I was glad to have them there to represent what true friends are.  True friends care about you, encourage you, and make you a better person.

My FB friend upset me.  Most of us probably have this type of FB friend.  I've watched other FB friends publicly cry foul and state that they are deleting a friend when they can no longer take what a person has to say, often citing their own values.  One of my reasons to keep such a person as a friend is because by tuning this type of person out, I am no better than he is. Ultimately, my group helped me to see that if this person isn't contributing to my life in a positive way and is causing me distress, I should just click him away.  And, so I will.  

I don't mind the placards created by various organizations that make a short, simple point and are posted by numerous friends.  Some are clever and informative, and some make me stop and think. I read them and scroll past whether I agree with them or not.   I like to know what people on all sides of issues think, but what bothers me is when someone (who doesn't think like me) states that he need not even acknowledge another person's or group's point of view because he is unequivocally correct in his own thinking.  He implores that a group quit hitting him over the head (his phrase) with their beliefs while simultaneously hitting me over the head with his!

This man will not notice that I am no longer among his 900+ friends.  My cupcake-loving friend would notice if I vanish and am not around to drag her out for a run on a hot summer day or to be talked into trying a caramel, chocolate chip cupcake special of the day.

TRX and Tabata

When my friend and I joined the group this morning, another woman was hooking her TRX to the fence at the baseball diamond.   We concurred that we don't enjoy the early morning speed workout, yet there we were.  The woman with the TRX enjoys strength training; I enjoy running.  She went about running and TRXing; I just ran.   Before leaving, the strength training aficionados invited me to do Tabata with them.  This is not runner speak. My friend new to running reminded me last week that we runners have a language of our own, which can seem intimidating to a newbie.  We throw out terms like half, ladder, etc.  Apparently, others throw out terms like Tabata.  From what I can tell, Tabata is a series of different plank poses to work core muscles that is timed to music.  And, there is an app for that, actually several different apps.  So there we were doing variations of planks that I didn't know existed in the freshly-mowed, damp, warm season grass.

I resolve to incorporate TRX into my next speed workout at the park.  And, I will deviate from my staid, predictable ladder and do half mile repeats.  I already know I don't enjoy those, but maybe starting with an 800 instead of a mile will help to power me through the duration of the workout.

New Shoes Treading Up Old Hills

What a great start to the day!  I opened a box of new, immaculate running shoes with the smell of new rubber soles.  Ahhh.  The familiar scent signals my brain that the upcoming days of training and racing are full of promise and possibility.  This is the day I retired my Brooks Ravena 3's detailed in purple with nearly 400 miles and replaced them with a fresh grey pair with neon green laces.  

The new pair has an intricate tread pattern yet to be worn away, and stories with these shoes are yet to unfold.  I studied the tread on two old pairs, and they told a story:  The shoes I retired have worn tread on the forefoot; the pair used before that have worn tread on the heel.  That shows a transition from being a heel striker to, well, whatever I am now, which is still a work in progress, but not a heel striker.    Yesterday's run was pretty miserable, but my outlook for today's run was very good just because of the mental lift from the shoes.  When I hit the pavement, I felt the sensation of a light, cushioned run.

It was overcast and a bit cooler this morning, so that helped to make my first true hill workout in a while bearable.  I found myself saying, "I eat hills for breakfast," which I must have seen on a shirt or heard another runner utter. Now that I'm training for my third KY Bourbon Chase, with its gently rolling hills,  I need one day a week dedicated to hill training.

Today I sought the steepest hill around, which is a mile from my house.  Luckily for me it has three different street approaches, so I can tackle it three different ways.  This hill and other smaller, nearby hills are familiar now, so they don't seem as daunting as when I first incorporated them into my running.   They are a necessity, so I embrace them.  I know to prepare well for my 19 miles having survived the hills of Central Kentucky last year and after acknowledging that I can't translate an elevation chart into a mental picture of the hills I will encounter.

Sit Next to Me at Your Own Peril

Yesterday afternoon at our children's swim team practice, a friend and I talked about the start of year-round school that began last week.  Our children's school is very good, but we began talking about the negative aspects associated with our children's particular schedule.

We changed the subject to be positive, and she was excited to tell me about her splurge on a personal training session that morning.  To keep up her level of motivation and to make progress, she said that her trainer advised her to "exercise first thing in the morning with a friend who is better than me."

I knew what she meant.  I asked her how far she can run, and she said two miles.   Then I told her that I would be running on a half mile loop with a group of motivated women early the next morning, and that she should join us.

"I could never run that fast," she said.

I swiftly challenged her with, "How do you know?  Have you ever tried?"

Then our conversation was interrupted and discontinued, and she had to leave.  On my way home, I stopped at her house to tell her that I would pick her up to carpool in the morning.  She didn't think that would work because she stays up late.  I told her that I do, too.

Then I told her, "This is what is going to happen: You are going to try to go to sleep early, and you won't be able.  Then while you sleep, you will dream about oversleeping or being late in the morning.  Then I will pick you up at 5:15AM."  And I added,  jokingly, "Don't make me beep my horn because the neighbors won't like me."

On the way to the run, I explained that all of us would do our own speed workout with the option to add upper body strength training.  I also mentioned that I find it challenging to meet so early in the morning, but I do it when I am in training because these runners are "better than me."  And, I choose races to train for because without the incentive, I would not push myself.  When our group of eight assembled before sunrise, my friend smiled broadly when she recognized three other familiar faces.  She already knew half of the group.

We all went about our workouts. I tried to catch up to my friend during a loop after falling behind to adjust my Gatorade stash, and I couldn't catch her.

Later, just before parting, she said casually, "I guess I'll see you next week."

My hunch is that my friend will begin to call herself a runner in the near future.

Y Run Gone Awry

I thought I had my act together this morning only to find out that I did not.  I made it to the YMCA to lift weights and then join the group run.  I saw two members who often run with the group in the weight room, and one asked if I had already finished the run. I immediately knew what had happened:  The run had been moved an hour earlier, and I had missed the notice in my e-mail last week.   I had confirmed with a friend that I would be there, so I felt pretty bad.

I went outside determined to catch her on the run.  I couldn't get my Garmin to work, so I noted the time and took off hoping to run into her.  We converged at an intersection near the Y.  Had I been a minute or two later, I would have missed her.  She was with another runner who was pushing the pace, and I happily joined their run through a neighborhood.  They were kind to add on another two miles or so through Bond Park to keep me company.

I was able to joke about being early for the run and make light of my perfectionism when talking about training for the Bourbon Chase.  I had the other runner laughing and commenting on it later in the locker room.   When we parted, I headed out again through the Park to make an even hour of it.  I was delighted that I saw my friend, and that we shared a run and a nice conversation (at a fast pace).  And then I enjoyed my freedom to slow the pace and take in the scene of families around the lake feeding ducks, fishing and using the paddle boats.  I got to notice a large, unusual bird bathing in the water and spotted an ancient pay phone undetected until today.  Even though the morning didn't go as planned, it worked out nicely.

Let the Training Begin!

I started training this week for my third Kentucky Bourbon Chase relay through the great state of Kentucky in September.  That is the reason I met a friend and member of the crazy, fast, young women running group (the name I dubbed them) for a speed workout.  I have a few observations from the run:

First, I was delighted to discover the new Hunter Street Park in Apex.  We ran on the paved, mostly- flat, half-mile path around ball fields.  This nearby, local resource is a good distance for speed work and seems to be undiscovered and not yet used by the running masses.  I saw a few people running nearby, but they did not venture onto our loop.  

Second, I was reminded that running is more fun when enjoyed with others, and particularly with those who share common goals.  My friend and I ran together, but we mostly ran toward each other around the loop. At each point of connection, we encouraged each other.  The loop is a good distance to feel that you are doing your own workout, yet to have a sense that you are working out with others.  When we began she uttered, "I'm a distance runner; I don't enjoy this!" referring to our speed work.  I could have said the same thing (and have in the past).  It's amazing how you cannot enjoy something, yet still do it, and find joy in the completion of the task.  

And finally, I have some serious work to do to get back to top form.  And, that is why one trains.  At one point when our paths crossed, my friend called out that we were subjecting ourselves to this for Boston.  It's not only my running that I need to work on, but also my outlook and mindset.  We both qualified for the Boston Marathon in Wrightsville this Spring.  She is looking and thinking ahead to running Boston, and that is motivating and inspiring.  I have not been thinking that way, but should be.  After all, distance running is a mental game.  I have got to get my head in the game.

Excuses, Excuses and Running with Horses

Around mile seven I settled into the heat today during a solo ten miler.  I noted that it didn't feel that bad  because my body and clothing were drenched with cooling sweat.  When I returned home, the thermometer read 94 degrees.

I got a late start at 9:30AM after watching my youngest daughter participate in her first mini swim meet with the Seadragons.  I was proud of her effort today because she has just learned to swim, and I reflected on her choice of sport during my run. Today would be a good day to be a swimmer, I thought.  And, when bikers whizzed by, I thought it would be a good day to be a biker.  And, when I saw walkers...

Other than being a proud mother on the ATT, a true gem for area nature lovers, families, and athletes, I thought about my lack of athleticism this past week.   I don't usually take time off from running or fitness classes, but this week just happened to work out that way.  I rattled off a list of excuses for not exercising over the past week.  Here's my top 10:   

  1.  It's been hot.

  2.  We hosted my sister and her family from out of town on Sunday through Thursday.

  3.  I usually take it easy the week after a race.

  4.  My kids were out of school all week, one of the only true weeks of the summer they have because of year-round school and our track assignment.  

  5.  This was the week before I begin training for my next race, and when I am in training, I obsess   about mileage; hence enjoy one more relaxing week.   

  6.  I just wasn't motivated. 

  7.  I was too busy to think about running.
  8.  I need to order new running shoes because my old shoes have enough mileage to be retired.
  9.  Sometimes I prefer more sleep over a run.
10.  It's still hot.

Several excuses easily came to mind, and I had to stretch it a bit to make a top ten list.  I snapped out of my list making mode when I saw two horses with riders trotting toward me on the trail.  My runner friends and I dodge horse manure regularly because we share the trail with horseback riders.  When we see horses coming toward us, we stay out of their way.

I've been running on the trail for nearly six years and cannot remember seeing fast-moving horses.  For a minute, I thought the heat had gotten to me, and that I was imagining it.  Usually a host of bikers, hikers, bird watchers, unicyclists, walkers with dogs, runners and families, boy scout troops, and university and high school track and cross country teams are in the mix.  Attentive, cautious riders guide horses on walks.   What I saw today was careless and dangerous.

Later, I came upon the horses again from behind, and they pulled away from me when they began trotting.  This time they trotted with a bicyclist passing them and another runner right at their heels and only slowed when faced with a series of barriers at a road.

When I finished the run, I read the bulletin board at the trail entrance to learn what it says about horseback riding.  It does not mention that horses should walk when sharing the trail with others.  It does state that horses have the right of way in most every instance you can imagine.  I learned that when I pass a horse from behind, I must call out to the riders that I am passing on their left so as not to spook the horses.  It seems that I was the only one who did not follow the trail rules today.

Inaugural Half Marathon Race Report

On Saturday I ran the much anticipated, inaugural Glenda Mooney Half Marathon on the American Tobacco Trail.  The conditions were less than perfect with much of the Nation, including the small town of Apex, NC, sweltering in record temperatures.  It was 74 degrees at the 8AM start.  When I returned to my car after the post-race party, the temperature was 90 degrees.  (My car's thermometer broke that day, so maybe the numbers are inaccurate, but it was hot!)  We had the luxury of a shaded, flat trail, which helped to keep the full effects of the heat at bay, and the temperature was not as hot as forecasted. Although the temperature was less than ideal, everything else was just right for a small race with charm.

The race was the brainchild of my friend Glenda Mooney.  She wanted to enjoy the experience of a half marathon with friends, but also wanted to avoid the steep fees and extra costs and hassles (like travel) usually associated with such races.  So, she started her own race and invited friends to join her.  The race motto was "We run because we CAN," which was printed on our race bibs.  The message is so simple and so right.

Another friend had printed the bibs with our names and numbers that we each selected.  She also printed a different Bible verse for each of us.  Mine was coincidentally, "I can do everything through him who gives me strength (Philippians 4:13)."  I have recited this one as a prayerful affirmation during a marathon.

A race perk included a personal hydration attendant (a participant's husband) who took directives of where to place chilled refills along the trail.  Once dispatched, he returned via bike to report the task was complete and even spelled my name with sticks on the trail to direct me to my supply.  How many half marathons offer such pure whimsy and charm?   The post-race party featured homemade muffins, iced lavender-scented cloths, and beautifully-simple, beaded medals.

As for my personal experience,  I ran the race for fun, and I didn't worry about my time.  I didn't think about carbo loading preceding the race, and I didn't hydrate properly because I was mulching my yard all day the day before in temperatures that reached 104 degrees.  On race day, after five minutes, I began to feel warm.  I wore my fuel belt with small bottles and carried a larger one.  My main concern was about not overheating.  Knowing I had fluids to refill at the mid-point helped to ease my only anxiety.  And, seeing numerous other runners along the trail confirmed that I wasn't crazy to be running in the heat.  I must admit that having committed to running the race was about the only thing that could have gotten me to run more than a few miles on this particular day.

When I needed to use the facilities (conveniently located around mile five), I was glad because I knew I wasn't dehydrated.  At that point my clothes were soaked, and I was dripping sweat .  The downside was that I left the pack for a few minutes during this pit stop and leisurely refilled my bottles.  As a consequence, I ran alone for the rest of the race.  Being alone wasn't bad even though I didn't bring headphones.  It was just me and my thoughts, and no one else to push the pace.  One of my thoughts was that my legs had never felt so warm and loose.  They enjoyed a new type of freedom of movement, but there was no speed in them.

I read a question once in "Runner's World" from a reader who was worried that he or she might be the last finisher in an upcoming race.  The columnist assured the reader that he or she would not be last because, really, what are the chances of that?  This was my slowest half marathon to date, and I was the last finisher.  And, I'm just as tickled with finishing this race as I was a month ago for being the first woman finisher in another race.  Just running this race was winning.