Boston Marathon Training: Week 17; Reflecting on Boston 2013

The past few weeks have reminded me why I am returning to the Boston Marathon.  I had been obsessively lost in my training, a selfish pursuit.  As the race approaches, the media is updating us on the lives of those most affected by the Boston Marathon bombings and the preparations for the upcoming race.  My reflection on last year began when I watched a portion of a video of Boston's Milton Middle School Choir performing the tribute song "I Will Run Again."  My initial reaction was that I didn't want to hear it.  It's too sad.  I learned this will be performed at the pre-race dinner, and I was relieved that I will not be attending it this year.  When I saw a picture of 8-year-old Jane Richard smiling with her new prosthetic leg designed for running and everyday use, I looked away quickly.  I did not want to see it.  It's too sad.  I read a Runner's World article about Demi Clark, a women returning to the race who was approaching the finish line at the time of the bombing.  She has suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  While reading that article, it occurred to me that this humanizing of the victims is something that I need.  Although it was sad, this time, I read it.  During each of my runs, I have prayed for the victims who have suffered physically and mentally and for those who know, love and support them.  I have not really known for whom I was praying, but now that I am learning of these individuals' healing, I have some peace.

This time of reflection has been emotional.  I feel excited about the race and have nervous energy while tapering.  At the same time, I am allowing myself to feel sad again and know that more sadness will come at times that I can't predict.  The final miles of a marathon can be not only physically draining, but also emotionally draining.  I once realized I was sobbing at around mile 20 of a race. Something just came over me, and I can't explain why.  I don't want to sob in Boston, but I am packing waterproof mascara because it is inevitable.

The Boston Public Library, the first large free municipal library in the United States, is a National Historic Landmark and a site on my list of tourist attractions should I have the time.  A new exhibit has opened there entitled "Dear Boston:  Messages from the Marathon Memorial."   The exhibit includes some of the items left at the memorial including shoes and personal notes.  Four white crosses in the exhibit represent the four lives lost that day and in the aftermath.  The crosses honor Martin Richard, Lu Lingzi, Krystle Campbell and Sean Collier.  When I read about this exhibit, I thought this is the last thing that I would want to see upon my return.  Perhaps it is where I should start.

This video is for "Run Run Run" written by Michelle Lewis.  Michelle has runners in her family and wrote this song after the Boston Marathon bombings.

Training this past week:
Sun.: 22 miles; 9:23 average pace
Mon.: Day off
Tues.: 2 miles warm up; 5 X 800 meters at 5K race pace with 400 meters easy recovery in between; 1 mile cool down.  I'm pretty sure I was at a 7:20 pace on average, but my Garmin went wacky at the track.
Wed.:  7 miles recovery; 9:47 pace (hilly, sunny and 85+ degrees!!!)
Thurs.: Day off
Fri.: 2 miles warm up; 5 miles at 7:56 average pace; 1 mile cool down
Sat.: 16 miles; 9:13 average pace